Random Thoughts From A Worldly Primate

This post is a blatant ripoff of the frighteningly insightful knowledge-bombs frequently dropped over at Apes In Elysium, which you should be reading instead of this piffle.

~1~
The only real-world use I have ever got out of the Irish language is impressing foreigners or talking about them. This is all I ever expect to get out of it. That so many of my peers are incapable of stringing a basic sentence together in Irish strengthens the notion I've held for years that we are pissing away millions of man-hours keeping a braindead language on life-support. This time and money could - and should! - be put to much better use elsewhere. Traditions be damned, keep a few experts trained up and leave it at that.

~2~
After a few trips through English airports over the past few years, I feel comfortable comparing their style to that of the yanks. What kept rattling around in my head was "this is such a kinder hegemony". When I was randomly stopped for additional screening, I was apologised to for the thirty-second imposition, and had the process of testing for explosive residue explained to me as I was swabbed and awaited the machine to give me the all-clear.

Further bolstering this notion is the family-friendly security lanes at London Heathrow - there are dinosaur decals around the metal detectors, and toddlers are encouraged to walk through on their own and receive rapturous applause and cheers from the staff when they comply.

When I set off the dinosaur-detector, I got a very intimate patdown by a cheerful bloke who entertained me with some stock Irish phrases he had learnt off. It almost distracted me away from his hand inside the rim of my jeans.

Every time I go through US customs, they make me feel as though they know I'm guilty of something, they just can't prove it this time and wave me on begrudgingly. Whether the friendly demeanour of the Brits is more insidious, at the very least, it's nice to be convivial.

~3~
It's a good thing foreigners find the Irish accent attractive, because as far as the visuals go, we're not a terribly attractive bunch. It's not anyone's fault, just a likely consequence of our relative isolation on the edge of Europe for generations. Do your part for Irish aesthetics and impregnate a foreigner. Stir up that Irish gene puddle!

~4~
I've mentioned the 'Dunning Kruger' effect on this blog before [one of my recent favourites, that one], but it's worth bringing up again.

Here's Sam Harris' take on it, from his book The Moral Landscape:

"[It's] true that the less competent a person is in a given domain, the more he will tend to overestimate his abilities. This often produces an ugly marriage of confidence and ignorance that is very difficult to correct for. Conversely, those who are more knowledgeable about a subject tend to be acutely aware of the greater expertise of others. This creates a rather unlovely asymmetry in public discourse - one that is generally on display whenever scientists debate religious apologists."

It's tough being the guy with facts on your side because you have to be sure to present them accurately and honestly, while also taking care to not overstate the significance of what you know, and acknowledging what you don't. The quote above uses religion, but the anti-vaccination movement is a better example. (Feel free to apply this theory to my bold proclamations about the Irish language, or all the other nonsense I pretend to be knowledgable in). It's not just the media that needs to take a closer look at the statements of self-appointed experts or activists, people need to call bullshit in everyday life so people don't get carried away. The list of those who get hurt by those who muddy the water with bad information and emotional appeals grows longer every day.

~5~
Psychics are another concept that lacks internal consistency. A common reason given for physics not winning millions by gambling is that they would lose their powers if they abused them for personal gain. I'm calling bullshit. Think of all the self-professed psychics in the world (I've seen one every couple of blocks here in Toronto, especially in the crappy neighbourhoods) - surely to Christ that with such a large sample size, at least one of them would have played the lottery and bought their way out of the very need to hold hands with filthy, gullible strangers and pontificate about their futures for $20 a pop.

~~~

What about you, dear reader? Do we see eye to eye here? Leave a comment to agree with me by pointing out my many aesthetic deficiencies.